Lazy Me vs. Better Me
I’m not lying. In the daily Summer Slams of life, the lazy me usually wins the main events. The lazy me gets what he wants — cheeseburgers, Netflix binging, naps, etc. He’s a bully. But not yesterday. Oh, he tried. He was loud and obnoxious. He whined, cried, and tried to rationalize. But he lost. His back was flat to the mat for the 3-count. To be fair, lazy me is on a losing streak. Better me has been kicking his ass with good habits.
Lazy Me Picks Another Fight
But lazy me really didn’t want to go to the White Water Center to hang out and paddleboard. Although better me planned it a week ago and invited his wife to go. Lazy me was persuasive.
It’s hot. The drive is far. The traffic is terrible. It’s comfortable at home.
Lazy me excels at this game of mediocrity, settling, and compromising — hence his winning record.
Better me, the better man in all respects, a true gentleman, heard the arguments, reared back, and punched lazy me in the mouth. And walked away.
He could’ve stood over the prone, fallen body of lazy me and taunted him with defiant words like, “I keep my commitments to my wife!” But he didn’t. He packed his bags, loaded up the car, and kept his word to his wife and to himself.
Lazy Me Plans His Next Attack
But lazy me wasn’t dead. He was down but not out. He took his lumps, retreated to his corner, and started scheming again. Lazy me is patient, calculating, and always lurking in the shadows waiting for an opportunity to pounce.
Better me and my wife located a perfect shady spot near the white water and set up home base. We sat down, relaxed, and better me enjoyed a tallboy Miller Lite. Lazy me sprung like a feral cat on an unsuspecting baby quail.
Isn’t this nice?
Why not just hang here, enjoy the shade, and read?
Do you really want to go paddleboarding?
It’s expensive, it’s hot, and it’s a long walk down to the river.
Hey, wouldn’t a nap be sweet? You deserve it. You worked hard this week.
Just relax, buddy!
Fight the Good Fight — Adventure Awaits!
The intoxicating, charismatic arguments by lazy me almost worked. I do love naps, and I’m looking forward to getting back to The Great Santini. Better me analyzed and overanalyzed the points and counterpoints, and just when the hand started to come down for the third count, better me kicked out, got off his butt, and walked the long trek down to the river.
We all have a lazy me fighting us daily. He wants us to blend in, do nothing spectacular, help no one, avoid adventures, warm the couch, and stay in our lanes. He’s convincing and a tired better me will often wave the white flag. But just like better me realized once again yesterday, lazy me’s arguments are usually exaggerated and overdramatic. The traffic wasn’t bad, the drive was pleasant, and it wasn’t too hot on the river.
The afternoon was glorious and worth all of the effort. Yes, it takes some effort to create adventures and our lazy selves despise effort.
Fight back and resist! Go live! Make adventures! We can rest in eternity!